Thursday, April 30, 2020

How Louis Vremsak became Edward Voltaire Garren (an American story)



In the early 1900s, a young man from Slovenia came to New York to work in the auto business. His name was Louis Frank Vremsak. When he became established, he moved in with a young woman, an orphan also from the Austro-Hungarian empire, named Marie/Mary Bolte. They had a child, our father, whom they named Louis Vremsak.




Around three years later, Ms. Bolte left Mr. Vremsak, taking with her their young child. She "fled" to Tampa Florida, where she met a man named Columbus Garren from Hendersonville North Carolina. Columbus was in the merchant marine, their liaison lasted about 9 months.  After he left her, his family in Hendersonville, offered this young "widow" a chance to come live with them, so she took her young son to Hendersonville, where the family operated a large rooming house for summer visitors. That experiment lasted the summer. Marie returned to Tampa and that fall, when it was time to enroll young Louis into school, she asked him, or convinced him, that he needed a "more American sounding name." So Louis Vremsak Jr. became Edward V. Garren, our father.  


Marie also told my father that his father was dead, died of pneumonia from a chill, giving his coat to a beggar after leaving the opera. This was not true. His father, Louis Sr. left New York, moved briefly to Pennsylvania where he co-founded the Adria Automobile corporation, then settled in Los Angeles in 1920. He was a pioneer avaitor, co-founder of General Western Aero, a company that designed airplanes, a self described "adventure seeker & treasure hunter", he had two more wives, was a member of the Santa Barbara Elks Lodge, and died in 1946, never knowing where his first son was, or how to contact him.  



In 2014 I discovered his grave in the Accaia Gardens of Forest Lawn Glendale California.  I took my brother Francis Edward "Gene" Garren to see the grave site.





My father, never believed his mother, but doing a diligent search for his father was too painful, so he never knew what happened to his father.  

One genuine "mystical" part of the story, Louis had another son, Gene Vremsak, who was a young marine, fresh out of boot camp, who with 31 others died in a plane crash in 1946. My brother was named Francis Edward Garren at birth, but when he was about 3 years old, emphatically told our parents, "Stop calling me Francis, that's NOT my name. My name is "Gene" which has been his "nickname" his entire life.  





Thanks to the internet, we have found a lot of the missing links to his story, and I have found our relatives in Slovenia. Thanks to Vladka Vremšak, Nika Vremšak and Nuša Vremšak for sharing their stories and photos and for making us feel very welcome in their beautiful country.  




The love of mountains runs very deep in our blood.  My brother loves the mountains of North Carolina where he lives, and our cousin Vladka goes hiking year round in the beautiful mountains of Slovenia.

Any of you who knew my father knew of his lovely tenor voice and his constant search for knowledge (often falling asleep reading the encyclopedia), both traits that I have as well. It turns out the Vremsaks are all musicians and scholars. The very first photo of cousin Boris Vremsak (Vladka's brother, Nika & Nusa's father) and my brother "Gene" (Francis Edward) Garren. Meeting them in 2014 was wonderful. We all looked at Boris and Gene and did many double takes. They even sound the same. We share a great-grandfather, Alois Vremsak.




Alois Vremsak with his second wife, the great grandmother of Boris & Vladka



I have always had a very high apptitude for all things mechanical, and I also enjoy singing, and have always been complimented on my singing abilities.  Our father had a lovely tenor voice as well, but he was the only one in the family (other than me) that shared that gift.  No one else has my mechanical aptitude.  I always was fascitated with automobiles and in high school wanted to become an automobile designer (engineering) but that never happened.Because there was no "blood" connection to any of this, my gifts were never encouraged by anyone in or out of the family, so I languished, whilc trying to figure out all of this on my own.  Discovering the Vremsaks removed a huge sense of not being connected to anyone from my life.Some other family photos are below:




 Edna and Edward in the early 1940's

 Edna and Edward in the late 1940's a couple of years before I was born.

Edward at a sink we constructed in the Cattail Creek house in the early 1970's.

 "Gene" Garren, Edward George 
Michael Lee, Edna and Edward Garren 1985.

 Gene hiking near his home in the mountains of North Carolina

Louis Frank Vremsak in Vienna as a boy..

 Our father told us that his father was a "trick rider" in the Austrian cavalry and a favorite of the emperor Franz Joseph.

 Another old photo of the young Louis Frank.

 Our grandmother Mary/Marie Bolte

 Marie with my brother Francis Edward "Gene" Garren

Marie was a giften Modiste' who could make any dress without a pattern.  She made this one.  This look best captures her tortured interior, the trauma of surviving Catholic orphanages from the late 19th century.  She was incredibly damaged, very similar to Joan Crawford of "Mommie Dearest."  We suspect she had multiple personalities, some of which were violent and abusive.

Gene and his son Michael circa 2000 in Los Angeles


Our father's genetics, and the origins of the Slavic peoples.  The blood of Ghengis Kahn and Attila the Hun runs in our veins.





Thank you for reading this very "American" story.  Generally, we are a nation of refugees, bastards, etc.  The American philosopher Eric Hoffer said, "We are the scum of the earth."  My friend Grace Ahn puts it best, 'Anyone who has anything in the old country never leaves.  The only people who leave and come to America are people who have nothing but a knife or a gun at their back." We inherit the unresolved traumas of our parents and grand parents.  

Our father was particularly formed out of his mother's trauma.  I wrote this story about how all of this prepared me for my vocation as a "Family Therapist.   

I hope you enjoy our story, "Ode to our Father" 



Wednesday, July 10, 2019

WHY THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY LEADERSHIP NEEDS TO RETIRE

JULY 5TH 2019

I had hoped that the DNC and DCCC would learn from the 2016 catastrophe.  Not only have they NOT learned anything, they are now running the same “fear based” message ("We must defeat Donald Trump”) without offering any agenda of meaningful change for the millions of young and working class people who have been left behind in the current economy.  

They also seem oblivious to the fact that most voters, particularly young voters, have NO party affiliation because they see both parties in much the same way as Gore Vidal (in his quote below).   This video underscores what’s wrong, and why the “old guard” just needs to join the cause (specifically by embracing and promoting the Green New Deal) or get out of the way.


They are already trying to manipulate, confuse and split the “progressive” vote with a flood of primary candidates.  They are hoping that neither Sanders or Warren have enough votes on the first ballot of the convention to get the nomination.  Then the “Super Delegates” (read “Super butt kissers”) will kick in on the second ballot, nominate Joe Biden and we will lose the election AGAIN to Trump.

Pelosi and Feinstein are the poster women for all that is wrong with the DNC.  They both patronize young people, dismiss any new ideas that are not their own.  Feinstein actually had the gall to tell a group from the Sunrise Movement that she knew how to do her job and if they disagreed, they should run against her.  
The “happy face” version was on CBS https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sb4ddeF91-I   

The full meeting is on "Now This" News, a better outlet to know what’s really going on:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2EfHOAZg3xc .  Notice that all they asked her to do was sign on as a supporter.  She won’t even do that, too afraid of alienating her Republican colleagues, who she clearly is more invested in pleasing.  

I don’t send either the DNC or DCCC a penny of money.  My contributions go to JusticeDemocrats.com, or individual candidates.  If a candidate is taking corporate money (like “Mayor Pete”) then he doesn’t need mine.

While the bought off by the Fossil Fuel, Wall Street, and Private Healthcare Republicans are destroying the world, the equally bought off old guard Democrats are quietly cashing in too, instead of fighting for the people they say they represent.

In the meantime, Climate Change is now a Climate Crisis, the middle of the country is inundated with too much water (over half the food that should be growing now is not because the fields are too wet to plant).   

Extreme heat now defines the east coast and most of Eurasia (140 F in most of India this last week). 

Hondurans who are trying to come here are “climate refugees” because after 4 years of drought, they can’t grow enough food and are being thrown off the land (they don’t own) much like the “Oakies” of the Dust Bowl era here in the 1930’s.

The time is NOW, we don’t have any more time to play with these issues.

Regards,  Ed

"There is only one party in the United States, the Property Party...and it has two right wings: Republican and Democrat. 

Republicans are a bit stupider, more rigid, more doctrinaire in their laissez-faire capitalism than the Democrats, who are cuter, prettier, a bit more corrupt—until recently... and more willing than the Republicans to make small adjustments when the poor, the black, the anti-imperialists get out of hand.
But, essentially, there is no difference between the two parties.”

Click the name for more information on Wikipedia.  
Gore Vidal was one of the most prominent "public intellectuals" of the 20th century.


Thursday, August 23, 2018

Lois Edna Verner Brackett Ramsay~A Feminist Ahead of Her Time

Edna with Episcopal Bishop John Bruno at the CSW parade in West Hollywood

A tribute to our mother Lois Edna Verner Brackett-Ramsay-Garren.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mrs. Garren was born on the east bank of the Tugalo river in Occonee county South Carolina on November 5, 1912. Her mother was Nancy Garner-Brackett of Stephen’s county Georgia, a local mid-wife. Her father was Edwin Ramsay, who owned a sawmill in Oconee county South Caolina (across the Tugalo river).

She was almost named Woodrow because she was born on the day Woodrow Wilson was elected president.

She grew up in a small farming community of Deercourt in Stephens county, on the west bank of the Tugalo River in north east Georgia. Her mother sharecropped to raise six children in an abandoned train station. At the age of ten, Edna realized that no one would ever take care of her, particularly a man. Inspired by her oldest sister Laura Louise, she became determined to escape the grinding poverty of her surroundings.

Edna at 14

At 15, she applied for and received a full scholarship and left home to complete a high school education at Tallulah Falls High School.  TFHS was established by the Georgia Federation of Women's Clubs in the early 1920's.  After women got the right ot vote, The "suffrage" movement became "Women's Clubs" with the specific mission of creating and enhancing educational and career opportunities for girls and young women in the United States.  

Her mother's response was to declare her "No longer my daughter" because Edna would not commit to staying home and taking care of her mother.

A geneologist friend compiled the history of Edna's mother's family.  There were significant family secrets and (shame filled) history.  Basically, Edna's mother was a "bastard" (born out of marriage).  Her mother had six children by 5 different men, wasn't married to the last 4, including Edna's father, Edwin Ramsay.  
A History of the Brackett Family of Stephens County Georgia

At TFHS she made the first reed basket at the school craft shop, was a loom threader in the weave shop, and was the first girl to take woodworking shop. The boarding students such as Edna made quilts, sweaters, and other crafts to be sold to help pay for their expenses. Mrs. Garren retained many of these skills, and over her lifetime made many quilts, knitting, needlepoint displays and other crafts. She made her last quilt in her early 90s, a photo of her with it is below.


She was Salutatorian of her graduating class. At the time of her passing, she was the oldest living graduate of the school.  She was named one of four outstanding former students of Tallulah Falls by the homecoming committee of the class of 1988.

Edna graduated in 1931 and lived briefly in Norfolk Virginia (with Louise) before moving to Tampa Florida in 1932.  Her older sister, Grace Kemp lived in Tampa with her husband, Alger Kemp (who was a gifted "ink" artist).  Her quick wit and charm brought her into favorable attention of local civic and business community leaders in Tampa and she enjoyed a lively career as a legal secretary and office manager.

Edna on Franklin Street in Tampa, mid 1930's.
She is in the suit and hat to the left of the street light pole, she made the suit and hat.  During the Depression, she made most of her clothes.

In 1939 she met Edward Voltaire Garren on an arranged blind date and the two courted for approximately 15 months and married at the home of “Sweet Pea” and Dora Mahoney in the Forest Hills section of Tampa on a Wednesday night in August of 1940.  A delightful recording of my parents telling how they met, married and the outbreak of WWII is at this link:
"Ed & Edna Garren remember 1940 & WWII" 

At the beach on an early date with Edward Voltaire Garren

In 1948, out on the town in Tampa, Florida

She had 4 pregnancies.  The first mis-carried at 5 months, the second was my brother Francis Edward "Gene" Garren.  The third was a daughter, Martha Edna who was born with Spina Bifida and lived 45 days.  I was the fourth pregnancy, born in 1949.  In typical "Southern humor" I occasionally joked that they should have quit while they were ahead, we all laugh.

After my baptism (at St. Mary's Dade City)  I was a year old.

In 1950 the Garren family moved to Dade City Florida where they lived for 35 years. In Dade City Edna opened the Credit Bureau of Dade City which she owned for ten years and then sold to continue a career managing the State Attorney and Clerk of the Circuit Court’s offices until her retirement in 1977 on the day she turned 65.

At the 75th Anniversary celebration of St. Mary's in Dade City,
with Kate Cowen & Beth Marie Sperry

During her time in Dade City, she was president of the Dade City Women’s Club, a Democratic Executive Committee Member and founder of the Eleanor Roosevelt Democratic Club for Women. She was very active in the life of St. Mary’s Episcopal church as well, serving on the Altar Guild, Choir, Daughter’s of the King, and the Episcopal Church Women.


She was always adamant that her name not be published as “Mrs. Edward V. Garren", stating that she was not Mrs. to anyone except herself.

With Frances & Cliff Freeman at the Western Auto Store in Dade City

In 1985 the Garren’s moved to Asheville North Carolina and soon became active in the life of All Soul’s Episcopal Church in Biltmore Village. 


In 1992 her husband Edward died at the age of 82 of congestive heart failure. In 1994 she moved to West Hollywood California where she became active in St. Thomas Episcopal church, volunteering in the HIV patient lunch program and performed in a production of “The Matchmaker” (the non-musical of “Hello Dolly”).

Photos of the West Hollywood years are below:

With good friend Hank Weinstein (2001)

 At the Grand Canyon

 Touring Monument Valley (1991)

 Going to the Monday Farmer's Market at Vista & Fountain

 Edna loved hats, and was loved by the woman who sold them at the Farmer's Market.

Edna in "Dillard House Heaven" at the Dillard House in Dillard, Georgia (2002)

 Edna with grandson Michael Lee Garren, his mother Wonhui (in red) and his aunt Lee Bass

 My God Daughter, Ruthenia Nicole Glenn-Ramirez, her husband Jorge and their two kids, Genevive and Gilbert (circa 2004)

 Edna at a Pumpkin stand in Santa Paula, CA (circa 1995)

Edna loved living in West Hollywood.  In additon to the weather, she enjoyed the rich diversity of the people she met and spent time with.  Years before, when I lived in Miami, she expressed her pleasure that I was learning Spanish.  "No one is really educated if they only speak one language. A person should know at least two" was her belief on the issue of "Multi-lingualism."  She explained that she had never had an opportunity to learn and use a second language, and was glad that both of her sons, and grandson Michael, spoke multiple languages.

In addition, Mrs. Garren participated in many Christopher Street West (Gay & Lesbian pride) parades in support of the Democratic Party. Mrs. Garren received two “Outstanding Citizen” awards from the City of West Hollywood, and November 5, 1992 was declared “Edna Garren Day” in recognition of her 90th birthday.

 Luis & Edna at one of the many CSW (LGBTQ Pride) parades we were in

 With Julie Summers at CSW

 Councilmember John Jude Duran presenging her award for her 90th Birthday

 With U.S. Senator Bob Graham whom we supported for President

We were honored to attend the wedding of Angelique & Cleophus Rawls

In 2005 Edna went to live with my brother Gene Garren in western North Carolina.  She enjoyed her "Mountain Years" which were very close to the Northeast Georgia hills she had left in her youth.  

 Edna's room in Asheville NC. One of her many quilts.

 One of her early quilts, which I still have and cherish

Edna at her 95th Birthday Party in Asheville, NC (2007)

Edna Garren (Lois Edna Verner Ramsay-Garren) passed away on Tuesday August 24th, 2010, from (to use her words) “Old Age and Aggrevation”. She was 97 years old. She had been in declining health for about 12 months. She passed away peacefully around 8:40 AM (EDT) in Burnsville North Carolina, her oldest son Gene was with her when she passed.

This quote in many ways, embodied how our mother Edna lived her life.
"Faith is not believing that certain claims or statements about God are true. Genuine faith presumes a relationship with God...and a way of seeing the world as life-giving and nourishing rather than as hostile and threatening.”  
Brother David Vryhof, Society of St. John the Evangelist

The video of her 90th birthday party is here.  There are two parts, enjoy them both.  Edna's 90th birthday in West Hollywood, CA (2002).

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"I have the nerve to walk my own way, however hard, in my search for reality, 
rather than climb upon the rattling wagon of wishful illusions."
      Letter from (fellow Floridian) Zora Neale Hurston
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zora_Neale_Hurston
 to Countee Cullen
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Countee_Cullen


“There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique and if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and will be lost… the world will not have it.
It is not your business to determine how good it is, nor how valuable, nor how it compares with other expressions. 
It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open …” 

- Martha Graham, in a letter to Agnes De Mille; published in “The Life and Work of Martha Graham”